Tried and True Dating Do’s and Don’ts

Couple on a Date

Lives of Style is proud to introduce our NEW “Dating-Speak” Authority: Laura Pugliese.

Laura–formally trained at the WANT Institute by the pre-eminent relationship therapist–Dr. Pat Allen, is a Certified Communications Coach–one of only 100 who have personally studied under Dr. Allen. Laura combines her training, life experience and spiritually-driven gift for manifesting potent communications in interpersonal relationships. Laura teaches her clients how to cut through emotional reactions and communicate rationally with integrity and love.

Today our “Dating-Speak” Authority–Laura shares must-know dating do’s and don’ts that will help you find the success in your relationships.

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Lives of Style: If you invite a man out to accompany you to event and he says no, what do you say after to recover from the rejection? 

Laura: It’s important to accept that he may say no before you ask. That’s the risk when you ask. There is no reason to feel badly. Keep it short and to the point. Just say nicely, “No worries. I understand.” And smile. 

Lives of Style: What can you say to your friends when they disapprove of the man who you’re dating?

Laura: You can say, “You have every right to your opinions about the man I’m dating, and I appreciate that you want to give me your perspective.  I have heard you.  I want you to know that I really like him, and I want to continue to date him. I am willing to take the risk to get to know him on my own to see where it leads.  I also value our friendship and don’t want to put a strain on it. With that in mind, it would feel best to me if we agree to not talk about him. How do you feel about doing that?”

Lives of Style: How can you keep a man interested if you’ve recently concluded a long term relationship and you feel that he might be someone who you want to date in the future but aren’t ready yet?

Laura:  First know that it is a risk. Decide if the time you need is worth the risk of losing him.  If you know what you really need is time to heal, be honest with him about that, and take care of yourself. It’s not going to help your process to take on the role of trying to keep him interested. Ask him, “What are your thoughts about me checking back in with you after I’ve had a little time to decompress from my last relationship?” Keep in mind he may or may not be single or available at that time.

Lives of Style: What do you say to a man who constantly flirts with you but has taken no action to ask you out? 

Laura: Some men are just flirty, and or friendly. He may be in a relationship; gay, shy, or just enjoys flirting with you. There really isn’t a reason to say anything because he’s not asking you anything. Avoid interacting with his flirty banter for a while. He may or may not “get it” and step forward.  Focus on responding to men that ARE taking action and asking you out.

Lives of Style: Can you be interested in two men at one time at the same level and how do you proceed?

Laura: Yes, you can be interested in two men at one time. This is what the dating stage is for. Date both of them until one of them out ranks the other, and or offers an exclusive commitment. Pay attention to how you feel when you are with them each individually, and who it is you believe will be there for you at your very best and worst of times. Usually all things won’t come out equal.

While Laura may not be able to email each of you individually, she will answer select questions on her weekly blog.

Remember, log onto http://www.livesofstyle.com/the_last_word/ and email Laura at Laura@livesofstyle.com

 

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